Limbo Bar & Grille
by Celli
Summary: Multi-show crossover. What happened to Vaughn between seasons.
1. Author's Notes and Spoiler List

Limbo Bar & Grille  
by Celli Lane  
  
Summary: What happened to Vaughn in between seasons.  
Disclaimer: Not mine. None of 'em. At all.  
  
Introductory notes:  
  
Spoilers for Alias, Buffy/Angel, Farscape, Stargate,   
Witchblade, West Wing, Highlander, Smallville, and The   
Others. 'Cause, you know, the crack. :) Immediately   
precedes "Shiny Happy People" in Kiki's TPTBverse. The   
entire set of stories can be found here:   
http://chaos.horsechicks.com/fanfic/powers.html   
and is highly recommended.  
  
Okay, this is one of my insane crossovers. The spoilers   
are listed below, along with the characters mentioned.   
If you're feeling brave, read the next chapter, then come   
back and see if you figured everyone out. :)  
  
***  
  
Ready?   
  
Spoilers and characters mentioned:  
  
Buffy season 6 - Jenny, Tara (Jenny's "witchy friend")  
Farscape season 3 - Zhaan  
Alias season 1 - Vaughn, Sydney  
Stargate season 5 - Daniel Jackson  
Highlander season 5 - Richie  
Witchblade season 1 - Danny Woo and Conchobar ("Guinness   
boy")  
West Wing season 3 - Simon  
The Others season 1 - Mark  
Smallville season 1 - Lionel Luthor, Lana ("the little   
dark-haired girl")  
  
Tyche, Minos, Danae, and bartender Nick are residents of   
Christina K's "Powers That Be" universe, and she not only   
loaned them to me but encouraged my insanity, silly girl.   
What was she thinking?  
  
Thanks to all the HCs for the betas, and Kiki and Tina for  
the double shots of author help. :) 


	2. Limbo Bar & Grille

Limbo Bar & Grille  
by Celli Lane  
  
Water.   
  
Water, water, water.   
  
Vaughn thrashed about, trying to remember which way was up.   
He had to get out. Had to breathe. Had to--   
  
He crashed onto his wet leather-covered ass onto the   
ground. From somewhere nearby, he could hear applause and   
catcalls.   
  
"Points off for the dismount, man," someone said. Vaughn   
realized his eyes were closed and opened them.   
  
There was no water anywhere, although he was still soaking   
wet. He saw tables, chairs, a mechanical bull, and a sign   
advertising Rolling Rock beer. It was a big room, and he   
couldn't quite make out any entrances or exits.   
  
His brain supplied about six different explanations, most   
of them straight out of episodes of the Twilight Zone. *Mom   
never should have let me stay up and watch TV past my   
bedtime.*   
  
Only one of the explanations made sense, though. "Heaven's   
a bar," he said resignedly to the ceiling.   
  
Laughter from one end of the room. He looked over and saw a   
strange little group, maybe four or five people, gathered   
around a table. He noticed a tux, a business suit, and a   
brilliantly blue dress before the youngest one--the one   
with the most empty bottles in front of him--waved him   
over. "We get that a lot," he said.   
  
Vaughn squelched over to the table. "Heaven's not a bar?"   
  
"No. Limbo's a bar. I heard Heaven was an Olive Garden, but   
that might just be a rumor." The kid held out his hand.   
"Richie Ryan."   
  
"Hi. Michael Vaughn."   
  
"Have a seat. D'you want a beer? Hey, Janna!" Ryan yelled.   
"Bring an extra with you."   
  
A dark-haired woman came through the door. "Along with the   
six I'm already carrying? Jeez, even in the afterlife the   
women do all the work."   
  
All the men at the table rolled their eyes. "Yes, Jenny,"   
Richie said. "Except for the five times before this when   
it wasn't your turn." The woman grinned--apparently they'd   
had this discussion before--and sat down next to Vaughn.   
  
"Hey. Jenny Calendar." She passed out beer bottles to most   
of the others at the table. "Killed by a vampire, but   
there's all sorts of weird spells out there, so who knows?   
You?"   
  
"Michael Vaughn. Um...drowned. Maybe."   
  
"It's the maybes that kill you," Ryan said. "Or don't kill   
you, as the case may be." He popped the top off a bottle   
and handed it back to Jenny. "I was beheaded, but it was   
all weird and mystical, so they're keeping me around just   
in case."   
  
"How long?" Vaughn asked.   
  
Ryan took another swallow of beer. "Don't ask."   
  
"He and I got here around the same time," Jenny said. She   
pointed to the far end of the table. "Daniel's the newest.   
Just got here last week."   
  
"I got held up in another dimension."  
  
"Another what?" Vaughn peered at the man who'd just spoken.   
Maybe it was leftover from the drowning, but..."Are you   
glowing?"   
  
"Don't ask," everyone said at once.   
  
The glowing guy--Daniel--muttered something about radiation   
and jellyfish. Vaughn inched towards the edge of his chair   
and made a mental note to avoid the food. He eyed his beer   
suspiciously. Hell, he was already dead. How bad could   
glowing be? He downed half the bottle in one gulp.  
  
***  
  
The rest of the group seemed nice enough. A fellow   
government agent named Simon who'd been shot foiling a   
robbery. (Vaughn thought it was odd that Simon was in a   
tux, but considering his own attire, discretion seemed the   
better part of this conversation.) An older man with a   
lion's mane of a beard who refused to give his name and was   
given to monologues on "ungrateful sons, dammit." The lady   
in the blue dress, who turned out to actually *be* blue,   
who was drinking something very scary looking and called   
herself Zhaan. A blond kid a little older than Richie,   
Mark, who blushed madly whenever his death was mentioned.   
Vaughn made out a half-sentence about exploding sex and   
decided to stay away from him too.  
  
"Five *years*?" he said, horrified, when Richie finally   
came clean. "That doesn't make any sense. This place should   
be full, then."  
  
"Oh, most people who die don't come anywhere near here,"   
Jenny said quickly. "Or not for long."  
  
"Where do they go?"  
  
"The afterlife of their choice," Zhaan said. She smiled   
mysteriously. "Usually."  
  
Richie said, "All the girls seem to find their moms right   
away. That little dark-haired girl was scooped up by her   
folks before she even hit the door. And your witchy friend,   
Janna." He leaned over to Vaughn. "Of course, Jenny here   
wanted to stay because she thinks we're so sexy--ow!" He   
ducked away as she tried to smack him again.  
  
Vaughn absently deflected Jenny's arm as it came too close   
to his beer. "So does that mean this is my idea of   
perfection? Limbo?" What did that say about him? He   
thought grimly of the mess his life had been in *before*   
he'd gotten all wet. He had to have a talk with his   
subconscious. "At least they have beer."  
  
"And Nick will be in later to fire up the grill," Simon   
said. "Beer and burgers. And maybe Minos will stop by to   
say hi--he's a work before play kinda guy."  
  
"Minos?" Vaughn thought back to a murky Greek Literature   
class. "The king?"  
  
"Oh, no. Minos is in Accounting. Much more important..."  
  
"Oh," Vaughn said in a small voice.  
  
He felt a hand on his arm and looked up. Jenny was giving   
him a look that reminded him of Aunt Trish at her most   
precognitive. "Sometimes people go back."  
  
He tried to push away the excitement leaping in his throat.   
"How?"  
  
She grinned at him. "There are more things in heaven and   
earth--and Limbo--than are dreamt of in your philosophy,"   
she misquoted. "There are ways. If They decide you're   
needed, you'll go."  
  
Lion's mane huffed. "Well, *I*--"  
  
"Oh, shut up, Luthor," Daniel snapped. "You're just afraid   
that if they send you back, it'll be as a cockroach."  
  
Richie ignored them. "I've done a bit of guardian angel   
work here and there." Simon perked up at that. "I'd like to   
do more."  
  
"You will when you're ready," Zhaan interrupted. "It was in   
the orientation lecture."  
  
"Right, 'cause I listen to lectures? Oh, and there's some   
prophetic dreams...hey, remember that Woo guy? Tyche had   
him in and out all the time. But he was a special case."  
  
"We're all special cases," Mark said. He lifted his bottle   
in a sad half-toast. "Every one of us."  
  
"He and Guinness boy got zapped out of here a while back.   
Somebody his a reset button for them. Big time." Richie   
looked wistful.  
  
"So--you're all here hoping to go back?" Vaughn buried his   
face in his hands. "Five *years*?" Sydney could be dead by   
then. SD-6 could have taken over the world. Or...not. What   
was worse, being needed and stuck up here or not being   
needed at all?  
  
He looked up and saw his fear reflected in seven other   
faces. "So what do I do?"  
  
"You wait," Mark said. "And if you're smart, you drink,   
too."  
  
Vaughn sighed. Well, how many missions had he waited on   
before? This was just, um, a cosmic one. "All right, then."   
He lifted his bottle. "Let's hear it for Limbo."  
  
"To Limbo," the rest chorused, and Vaughn nearly smiled.  
  
There was a very loud BOOM! from over by the mechanical   
bull, and Vaughn noticed smoke coming from behind a pair of   
doors he hadn't seen before.  
  
"Nick," Simon said with a grin. "He likes to show off."  
  
"Niiiiick!" came a woman's yell from--well, nowhere. "My   
favorite saint! Find me some alcohol. And something   
yummy. I am having a *good* day!"  
  
"That would be Danae," Jenny said. "You might want to stay   
off her radar. Especially if you've had sex lately."  
  
Even more smoke piled out the door. Vaughn swallowed.   
"Daniel? What were you saying about jellyfish?"  
  
Daniel pushed his glasses up and glowed a little brighter.   
"Would you like to split a plate of sushi?"   
  
--the end-- 


End file.
